I love lying to kids. It’s so fun. My coworker’s daughter said she speaks 2 languages and I said I spoke 17,000 and she narrowed her eyes at me and was like “… no you don’t” and it was the cutest thing.
The last time I saw her I told her I was a “half-magician” that can only do 50% of a trick, and I showed her how I can tear a piece of paper in two but can’t make it come back together, and she got soooo annoyed with me. Absolutely adorable. Lying to children is the best
Coworker brought her daughter around again. Kid waited (with, imo, remarkable patience for her age) for me to finish up a work call, then asked me where I lived. I said I live in my office and she said “Hahaha no you don’t!” I was like “This one is less of a joke than I’d like it to be”
She was like “If you live here, where do you sleep?” And I said “On the floor” and she said “Hahaha eww!!” In the most chipper voice imaginable and left to draw on the whiteboard
Oh my god i love it. I once kept pretending I didn’t know an Ariana Grande song was, and then I asked “who’s Ariana Grande? I don’t know her.” And she got mad and so she explained and I was like “what? I’ve never heard of ANY of those songs” and she got mad and said she’s a famous singer and I went “what? She’s a singer? What’s a singer?” And she lost it and was like “ITS A PERSON WHO SINGS MUSIC” and I went “… what’s music?”
Just found out my facebook birding group is public because my cousin (a lawyer who is not into birds) casually said to me “saw you couldn’t identify a willet the other day… pretty embarrassing”
the ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ has only been actually typed once by a single person, everyone else who has ever used it has just googled “shrug emoji” and copy-pasted it
why repaint the mona lisa
As someone who has painstakingly typed it out because I forgot there were other options, I can guarantee my forgery was not up to the quality of the original.
did you install a katakana keyboard just to type it or did you have to Google “katakana alphabet” or something and copypaste from that
Pretty sure I just did a vaguely cursed bootleg thing like this:
-\_(“✓)_/-
that’s a guy who has lost control of his life. there is no more cheerful nihilism in his smile, no more mischief in his eyes. that’s an emoticon with clinical depression
